...don't know if anybody out there is lucky enough to own one of these delightful objects. Seriously - these things are the dog's bollocks (that's a good thing BTW Americans). It's a digital jukebox not unlike the I-Pod. Well actually, quite unlike the I-Pod. Those things look good, no question. But.... my little black beauty has 40Gb of space (imagine that - My PC almost feels inadequate, truly we are in the 21st century). Plus, this wee beasty can play more or less every format under ...

My absolute favourite, favourite thing. Guess this makes me a “non smoker”. My view on non-smokers are mostly in-line with Bill Hicks’ most popular rants: “obnoxious, self-righteous fucks, my greatest fear is that if give up smoking I will become one of you.” Still, this latest love affair with the demon weed could not last. Like returning to an ex-girlfriend it always gets ugly eventually. And it was getting ugly. A pack and a half a day was becoming a not unusual situation. First-thing...

Well you shouldn't obviously, there is no reason at all why you should give a shit about me, my unpopular views, my apalling taste in music or my unpleasantly detailed descriptions of past missadventures. Still - I'm going to post it all here anyway, because: a) Putting the contents of my fevered ego out there may just stave off mental illness for a few more years. It'll be fun. c) This technology gubbins is the bees knees isn't it? So sit back, relax, pour yourself a nice glas...